So it’s been a little while since our last episode—would you believe I haven’t had a dumb blind moment in all that time? Never fear, however, I’ve pulled something out of the vault and dusted it off purely for your enjoyment.
I live pretty close to an incredibly busy shopping strip, which is handy considering I can’t drive and living somewhere in Whoop Whoop would be pretty inconvenient. I make regular trips there (the shopping strip, not Whoop Whoop) to pick up things like fruit and veggies and other items I might meed in between my monthly grocery delivery.
I was making one of these trips a few months ago and was on my way back to the tram stop (yeahhhh…. It might only be about fifteen minutes’ walk, but if there’s a tram I’m taking it) when, through the sound of The Cars’ Just What I Needed in my earphones, I heard my name being called.
I looked up to see a figure walking past me in the direction I’d just come, smiling and waving as she passed by, clearly in a hurry. She’d said something like ‘Ash! Hey, how are you?’ so I returned it with a wave and a ‘Oh, hey! How’s it going?’ before we each turned back in our respective directions and I was left thinking ‘who the fuck was that?’
Believe it or not, it’s not the first time something like that has happened to me. I have actually conducted entire conversations with people without having the faintest clue in the world who they are or how they know me. The key: just bluff your way through it and pray for them to say something that gives away their identity. Or for a way to extract yourself from the conversation. Either of those would work.
Of course, then there’s the reverse instance—where you think you recognise someone but it turns out to be a complete stranger. That’s always good and awkward. Fortunately, however, I’ve never been stuck in a conversation with one of these strangers because they’re too polite to admit they don’t recognise me. Although, I’ll admit, that situation does sound like comedy gold.
So the bottom line? Vision impairment involves a lot of bullshit and bluffing. I also subscribe to the notion of ‘when in doubt, don’t say hi’ – if the person actually does know me, they’ll know I’m legally blind and won’t take it personally.